The Wedding, the heist, Jesse's gift and Johnny C

Oh, so you are all DYING to know the story. I just can feel it in my bones!

We wake up to gray skies on Saturday morning, the day Sean Busby is about to marry Mollie Shambeau in Waupaca, Wisconsin. No worries, we know Jesse will be there to help out on his 15th birthday to keep the rain away. We all expected an amazing sign from Jesse, counted on it really.

You see a week before my beloved bike - Johnny C - was stolen out of my garage. Not just any bike, mind you. This bike has been ridden in Jesse's honor for years, endured Death Valley 5 times in fact. No, I wanted Johnny C to come home. I wasn't all that hopeful, after all you rarely hear about bikes recovered. I posted a note on Craigslist letting everyone know what my bike looked like and that if anyone saw it, would they please call me. I filed my insurance claim begrudgingly and carried on.

As I sat at the Shambeau garden with many friends watching my office spouse marry a man I love like a brother, I was choking up. I could hear owls hooting in happiness. Geese flew over. The sign? No way. As the vows were exchanged I again cried while Sean and Mollie publicly recognized Jesse bringing them together - after all, they would never have met if he hadn't died and I knew more than anything Jesse was smiling down on them. I could FEEL it.

During the ceremony my phone rings and rings (on vibrate of course, I'm not that rude, but always having my phone on me is a habit left over from Jesse...no mom is ever away from her type 1 son, no way.) I get on the bus to travel back to the Indian Crossing Casino (which is not a casino, nor native american looking) and listen to my voicemail. A complete stranger is telling me that a thief has posted my bike for sale.

In somewhat of an excited and swift moment I call Charles back home and ask him to work with this guy to set up a meeting, and to bring the police. It's within a short amount of time that Charles is meeting with a wonderful officer named Steph...she's leery we are going to get this...but then Charles lets her know of Jesse, of the wedding and the meaning of Johnny C. She calls my friend Sarah MacKesey who is also a police officer and they are ready to roll. At the same time my friend Vicki G is letting me know that she also is trying to call the guy and knows it's my bike (her partner is also a police officer). My phone is ringing. A wedding is happenings. Toasts are made. And as Sean Busby stood to toast my Jesse Alswager, I get a call. A simple sentence from Charles, "We have your bike." And a mass of people who never met me, but know of Jesse, roar.

Did he get arrested? No. Was Johnny C lying sadly on a dirty floor in a seedy neighborhood? Yes. But nothing was removed from my biked - not even my trail pass with my name! No doubt it was my bike.

All I wanted was my bike back. And Jesse, well, he sure gave us a sign. A big one. There is no doubt that he wanted to be part of the day...and he was.

Congrats to Mollie & Sean and happy to "me" for having my bike..in the HOUSE...he's no longer living in my garage.

And that my friends is a happily ever after. Oh and by the way the gift they are opening symbolizes Jesse, and their marriage. As Dave Matthews so wonderfully said, "You and me together, we can do anything, baby....all the way to the end of the world...."

the latest Dlife column- Making your worst your best

When Jay Hewitt came to town recently to talk to a group of diabetes educators I was lucky enough to have a seat. I couldn't help but remember the above photo of Me, Samantha, Joey and of course Jesse, as they crossed the Ironman Finish with me so many years ago.

I hope this column inspires you.

http://www.dlife.com/diabetes/type-1/michelle_alswager/diabetes

How to Celebrate Jesse's 15th Birthday

In 2005 I met a young man named Sean Busby. A professional snowboarder, Sean had recently been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. A story all his own (and can be read at www.ridingoninsulin.org) Sean was determined to find good in his diagnosis. Sean and I worked together to bring Riding on Insulin to Wisconsin in the Spring of 2005. Jesse participated in that first camp and every other Wisconsin camp after that.

In 2007 I started working at BRAVA Magazine. I met our fashion editor, Mollie Shambeau. We had a different way of working with one another (i.e. LOUD) and over the years developed a strong connection. In that time Mollie would receive several text message "merks" from Jesse. For those who don't know, a "merk" is kind of like a 1980's "made ya look". Mollie and Jesse met for the first time in November of 2009. The merks continued.

In that time Mollie had never met Sean.

When Jesse died it was never a question to me that Sean would deliver the eulogy. Over the years Sean became family to us and a big brother to Jesse. It was then that Sean and Mollie met for the very first time coming together in a time of great sadness.

Flash forward to June of 2010 when Mollie packed up her bags full of scarves and shoes and moved to nowhere, Utah, to live with Sean. Since then they have traveled the world literally...and while on an expedition in Iceland, Sean proposed. (Photo above)

While driving to this moment in Iceland, "You and Me" by Dave Matthews Band came on - a song that meant a lot to Jesse & I. Signs were everywhere.

Today I received a voicemail from Mollie checking in and "Oh, by the way, Michelle, mark your calendar, we are getting married on 9/24!" What an indescribable feeling to realize as it came from my phone...that Mollie & Sean had picked Jesse's 15th birthday for their wedding day - without even realizing it.

I believe as I've said many times that death did not silence Jesse's soul. Sometimes a solid sign from him - like this - is enough to keep me smiling.

There is no doubt to me that Jesse will be there on 9/24/2011 to celebrate both his birthday, and their new beginning.

Six have died - the rest of you keep living please

As 2/3 - the anniversary of Jesse's death - creeps up on me it forces me to try to make sense of things. I wonder sometimes if all the news I hear of deaths in the diabetes community are just escalating because I'm sensitive to the deaths, because facebook brings us all together, or if in fact there are more deaths.

Last night was a hard night for me. I have been struggling with how I will deal with Jesse's death on the actual anniversary. I had made the decision to stay positive and not think of death, or replay the day.

Last night, I learned of three more deaths in the diabetes world. All young. In fact, one was a 16 year old boy named Jesse. Horrible for me. Horrible for them. As I woke in the morning I learned of 3 more. All under the age of 28 (one was an 18 month old who's diagnosis was missed).

I wanted to take a moment to say to you all that are living with diabetes - please do not take my posts as a means to make you sad or scared. No, I repost and talk of these deaths so these families can find me. Because the best counseling I could get was from families who lost before me. I hope to be there for these new families and they transition to this new group that once again, no one wants to be part of.

So for those of you living with "d", live it large. :)

Godspeed Little Man

A tribute to Jesse Alswager and Trent Nicholson in Death Valley - we miss you.