Friday, August 8, 2008

An Honest Blog - should I still do IM?

Ok, usually I try to post something funny.... but I've had a few days of pondering. Maybe I can chalk it up to some scared "29 days to IM" thoughts, but maybe not. Here's the deal - listen and weigh in, will ya?

So here is the deal. I've worked what, 18 months on this? Well now it comes down to a lot of the local efforts. I've been busy trying to get host families lined up to house the 12 athletes and their families AND their friends....establishing a "Triabetes Headquarters" at the finish line (thank you SHARENDIPITY.COM you are rockstars!!!)....putting together a week long schedule, a welcome reception, dealing with NA Sports (who are FABULOUS) about logistics for safety issues on the course, trying to figure out where the best filming locations are...what is the story really going to be....who's going to market it....distribution...showing at local film festivals....

and on top of all that...I'm trying to train...and be a single mom to three great kids....and looking for a great new job (which I think I found...more to come on that).... I'm tired. And I think this: It is difficult to arrange the schedule and life of one ironman athlete during IM. How the HECK am I going to manage 13? I'm feeling overwhelmed.

I talked to Joe Brady today. Told him I was feeling a little like I should drop out of racing. I mean, someone has to make sure it runs smooth from a business standpoint. It should be me. It's my dream, my goal. Of course he answered that I just need to prioritize and basically told me to stop being a whiny baby (in his own way, but I know what he was thinking!).

Do I race? I biked 30 miles today, 22.5 HARD miles on Wednesday in the pouring rain on the hills of Mt. Vernon with an 20 mph pace...and I'm getting up super early to bike 60 miles tomorrow morning....

Should I do it? Am I being selfish? Ugh...... help?


J-Wim said...

Do it. You worked for it, do it.
What's the worst that happens? You don't finish? Big deal, you tried.
My vote (as if it counts.... :-) is do it and see where the day takes you, and enjoy the rest of the rewards of your other efforts too.

Anne said...

While you are pondering, remember that each athlete is ultimately responsible for taking care of his or her needs during this event & weekend. Is there some stuff that can wait until the race is over (such as film festivals/distribution stuff)? Can you delegate anything to someone else?

Michelle, if your dream is to be on the course with everyone, do it. It isn't selfish. But if you feel like you would be miserable racing because you'd rather be with the camera crew (or wherever), do what you feel you need to do.

I think anyone would support you, no matter what. But I think you are like me; it is hard to let go of a goal once you've set it. I would love to see you out there on the course, but this is a decision only you can make!

Greg Tracy said...

Do it. And here's why...

You are providing inspiration for lots of people.

You're inspiring your Triabetes athletes.

You're inspiring your kids.

You're inspiring total strangers that stumble across this great story.

You're inspiring yourself.

But perhaps most importantly, you won't cave in to the evilness of doubt. Everyone suffers from it, but only a few of us defeat it.

So don't sweat all the small stuff. Everything will work out great!